Ex-Heroin Addict Tells Task Force: I Was Killing Myself
Emotions ride high as drug and alcohol abuse among state's youth discussed at hearing.
Editor's note: This is the first of a five-part series about a hearing held at Daytop Prep School in Mendham by the Governor's Council on Alcoholism and Drug Abuse Task Force on Heroin and Other Opiate Use Amongst New Jersey's Youth and Young Adults.
One mother had lost her son, another was trying to save hers.
Both were keynote speakers as they testified Tuesday to the Governor's Council on Alcoholism and Drug Abuse Task Force on Heroin and Other Opiate Use Amongst New Jersey's Youth and Young Adults at the Daytop Prep School in Mendham.
The task force heard from prosecutors, police officers, mental health professionals and parents in the second of three planned hearings that will result in a report to be delivered to Gov. Chris Christie and legislature, chairman Frank Greenagel Jr. said.
According to Greenagel, that report will recommend ways to improve prevention, treatment and recovery support services of opiate and heroin abuse and will be available online to the public.
Emotions ran high throughout the hearing, on both sides of the table. Family members of those who have struggled with the process of getting help for their loved ones shared their painful journey through the system. Their stories sparked obvious emotion in the members of the task force, many of whom have had their own journey through addiction, lost a loved one to addiction, work helping those with addiction or some combination of all three.
The testimony of the residents laid out the prescription pills as a gateway to a full-blown heroin addiction.
The Task Force considered the testimony from Hunterdon County Prosecutor Anthony Kearns who recently warned of dangerous heroin-causing overdoses among county residents.
“We have the purest heroin out of the surrounding states,” Kearns said.
Sparta Police Sgt. John Beebe spoke of a program he designed to get into the middle and elementary schools to change the culture early. The plan would be to have officers mentor 20 students from each middle school grade, give them a uniform, and allow them to accompany officers at special events.
But the testimony that ranked among the most powerful belonged to one of the recovering addicts known only as Emily. Emily, who is a graduate of the Daytop program, began taking pills at 14-years-old and within a year had transitioned to heroin.
“I was digging my own grave, basically. You always try to chase that first high, and you keep moving up and up,” Emily said. “I started sniffing heroin. One bag, then two bags, then three bags.”
According to Emily, she dropped out of school and began selling drugs to support her habit.
“I wanted to be like Johnny Depp in the movie 'BLOW.' That was my inspiration,” Emily said. “I wanted to be a drug dealer.”
Soon, despite swearing she would never use a needle for drugs, Emily found snorting heroin wasn’t enough.
“It was Christmas Eve and I will never forget it,” Emily said, recalling the first time she shot heroin. “I went from one bag to 20 bags a day before I came here. I was shooting 20 bags a day.”
Emily said an arrest with more than 100 bags of heroin led her to Daytop and it was after 60 days she realized she really wanted help.
“I felt happy being sober and I found different ways of dealing with my emotions besides using drugs. I was here for almost a full year and it was the best thing that ever happened to me,” Emily said. “Treatment works, if you want it, it works.”
Emily supported the notion that more treatment centers available could make a difference to those struggling with addiction and that she was proof of their effectiveness.
“I am going to college, I got my permit here and now I have my license and my own car and I wake up happy and thankful,” Emily said. “I love my life now and I embrace it. “
Tuesday’s hearing coincided with the two-year anniversary of Emily’s Daytop graduation and James Curtin, executive director of Daytop and Task Force member, described Emily as a miracle.
“She is the reason why we do what we do,” Curtin said.
amazed78
10:06 am on Wednesday, July 11, 2012
a little info on suboxone before getting people started on it...Is Suboxone Addictive?
Buprenorphine is considered a partial opiate agonist. It works in the brain on the opiate receptors and works just like other opiates. It can be understood as a very low powered opiate – and like all other opiates – it is addictive.
Because Suboxone contains buprenorphine, it is also an opiate, and is addictive like any other opiate.
By taking Suboxone – you are simply trading an addiction to a drug like heroin or oxycontin – for an addiction to buprenorphine.
concerned parent
10:15 am on Wednesday, July 11, 2012
There is major drug problem. I've seen young adults and what would appear to be resonsible adults deal right under our noses at the playground, authorities can only do so much on their own. How can we start to make a difference as parents and concerned members of the communtiy? Any suggestions? Something has to change..
FourScore
12:12 pm on Monday, July 16, 2012
My suggestion would be to stop wasting tax money on arresting, convicting and jailing drug addicts, and put that money towards treating them. Of course it won’t be 100 % successful, but anything would be better than the dismal failure that is our current drug policy.
Jefferson Mom
11:15 am on Wednesday, July 11, 2012
You can attend meetings of the Municipal Alliance in your community. Concerned parents can join together to educate the community.
Jefferson Mom
1:57 pm on Wednesday, July 11, 2012
If you are a parent experiencing behavioral problems with your child, including but not limited to substance abuse, there is a parent self help group that meets every Monday night at the Jefferson BOE community room from 7P-830P. BILY (Because I Love You) brings parents with similar problems together to help their children make better choices. For more information email: bilyofjefferson@yahoo.com or visit us on facebook.
angela tamayo
10:07 am on Monday, July 16, 2012
I am a recovering addict that takes suboxone and although people say its trading one addiction for another, I can live with that. The medicine in it keeps my cravings under control and helps me to stay clean and heroin free some people don't realize that there its more to addiction than just stopping. There are chemical imbalances in my brain that needneed help too. For now until the medical community can figure out how to fix that I will stay on suboxone. I am also on antidepressants and go to counseling as well as narcotics anonymous meetings 3x per week. So before a non addict slams this medication they should know all there its to know about addiction.
anonymous
12:45 pm on Monday, July 16, 2012
Maybe you use it the way it is actually supposed to be used, but there are plenty of heroin addicts who abuse it just as bad as they abused the heroin. But I also know people who were addicted to heroin who are clean now and don't take anything at all...to me its as simple as if u don't want to get high, then don't. The point of going to detox is to clean your system of all the opiates so your body can function normally without them or any substitute for them. You need your suboxone because u either didnt get detoxed and need something to help you from withdrawling, or because you still get SOME sort of high from it, hence why it "keeps your cravings under control".. the point is you are still dependant on some sort of drug...but at least you are getting help other than just taking the suboxone like going to meetings and counceling...your next step is to get off the suboxone, and if you truly want to stay clean, you will be just fine without it. just say NO...i hope the best for you
Jimmy Lawrence
3:06 pm on Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Good going kid, don't let anyone tell you one addiction for another. Ive been on Saboxin 6 years and it works, I hardly ever think of getting high, and having touched dope in 5 years. Its not like dope at all on dope you need to take more and more, but I been on 2mg of Sub for years, have my own business now, all stuff that would never have happened on my own
Stacie Bohr
2:18 pm on Monday, July 16, 2012
@anonymous...what are your credentials in the field of addiction? I have none. But one thing I have learned from several friends who are professionals (either physicians or therapists) that not only do people have a physical addiction to their drug of choice, addiction is also a form of OCD. It's not as simple as "just say no"! I
Concerned
4:37 pm on Monday, July 16, 2012
we are confusing two processes in treating addictions. the first is the detox process that must be done in order to gain a clear understanding of the underlying issues that are causing a person to self medicate. Perhaps it began with drinking, then pot and so on. There is an underlying dual diagnosis that must be addressed. After the detox their needs to be residential therapy to deal with the "why". Today's healthcare for addiction is focused on detox alone and that is a revolving door. Detox and residential therapy by MD's is required to break the cycle, and that is not easy. Never give up.
cv
6:07 pm on Monday, July 16, 2012
Wow, we all wish it was just say no . Mind over matter would be great but it isnt that simple. I just watched my sister destroy her life for drugs . Her new home is Rikers Island . @Concerned you are dead on. Everyone who drinks , smokes or uses drugs has a trigger for the behavior and it has to be addressed. My son has several opiate addicted friend who were in and out of 30 day rehabs IT ISNT LONG ENOUGH. Then these addicts go back to their old lives and dont have the tools to deal with what triggers the behavior so they do it over and over again.
JT
5:19 am on Saturday, July 21, 2012
Such ignorance. The Just Say No person really pissed me off. Its like saying to someone just dont breathe. Well not really but when you are in the throes of addiction it might as well be. The purpose of a detox is to get the dope out of your system. Now your brain has all these empty receptors looking for....the dope. Now is when the with draw come into play. Suboxone is a partial binding opiate. Yes it is a crutch but since it only partially fits the receptor it gives your brain time to repair itself. Think a triangle fitting inside a square. Almost fits but not exactly. Suboxone takes away the horrible feelings of kicking the drug which allows the individual to focus on trying to fix their brain and what led them to doing heroin. So dont make assumptions, pass judgements or make it seem as though you know what ur talking about until you have some knowledge of what you are talking about. Another proud Romney voter over there. Not thinking just reacting.
Concerned
9:46 am on Saturday, July 21, 2012
JT,
Please read m posts on this serious subject. I am thinking and not reacting as you put it. Your post was appropriate until you stated the person who thinks someone can just say no is a Romney supporter. I for one am voting for Romney. But that fact has nothing to do with this discussion. Nor did your comment.
Tammy
3:27 pm on Saturday, July 21, 2012
Just a heads Concerned-You might want to look into each candidates view on funding for treatment and insurance for those who have battled addiction (a "pre-existing condition once you are treated for it). A vote for Mr. Romney would be a knife in the back of a subject you are very passionate about.
Concerned
10:25 am on Sunday, July 22, 2012
Tammy
neither candidate is perfect but I am certain that the pain and suffering from the state of the economy due to Obama's inability to be an effective leader is causing a great deal of stress in peoples lives. Hard core unemployment at 14% is not a statistic but reflects profound personal suffering of people and families. No one tracks this but I am sure along with this pain from being unable to work is a spike in alcoholism and other abuses. No matter what insurance one has even under Obama's healthcare act, no one will be covered for treating the underlying cause of addiction, only for detox which is 7 days of in patient coverage. what is needed in a majority of cases is 60 to 90 days of in patient evaluation of by MD's as to the reason a person is self medicating. then learning coping skills and perhaps appropriate meds to deal with the underlying issues.
Tammy
3:28 pm on Saturday, July 21, 2012
*heads up
Mrs.Robinson
5:11 pm on Sunday, July 22, 2012
If none of you here have ever been injured and have had several surgeries to try and correct the problem and had to take pain meds to control your pain and give you some kind of a quality of life then you are just lumping anyone that takes pain meds into "addiction" whereas those people are "chemically dependent". There is a difference.
Jimmy Lawrence
3:20 pm on Tuesday, July 24, 2012
I haven't touched heroin in 5 years and have my own business and most people could never tell I had a problem, I tried AA but they made me say I did not have problem with heroin but booze, and all the NA kids just wanted to hook up with other addicts. Saboxin works, but you have to be ready to stop and find a good doctor you can be honest with, and tell him when you slip. I've found myself and find strength in helping other free them-self. Heroin will give you wings to fly but will take away the sky. If the governor wants to help, all I can say is treat drug addict different than the dealers, the way it is now they both end up in the same rehab and the system does not work. People look at addiction as a moral or personality flaw instead of a sickness. So many people could be helped with a psychologist to talk to and a suboxone prescription. We send kids with drug problems to jail who learn how to be criminals. Now we know more about heroin, when I was getting started it was something Jimmy Hendrix did, or Janis Joplin, and I guess by becoming an epidemic at least there is more understanding, but we have a long way to go. Rehabs don't work, and they are just money making machines for the insurance companies. I don't know solution but will tell you our current system does not work, Ive seen so many die cause of shame.